July 31, 2007

who invited bitter betty?

Posted in mousie at 8:55 am by Anonymouse

Anyone who has just had two miscarriages should totally join my small group.  You’ll love hanging out with a mom of new twins, a pregnant gal due in early November (two weeks after my original due date) and a pregnant gal due in early February (two weeks before my second due date).  We talk about great stuff like:

  • baby showers
  • pregnancy dreams
  • maternity clothes
  • “the pooch”
  • cloth diapers
  • babies sleeping through the night
  • all of the Monday night babysitters we’re going to need in a few months

I’m sure there are other great things that I’m forgetting.  Two weeks in a row now, I’ve nearly shot my face off.  I can’t wait for to other two to have their babies so we can switch to:

  • breastfeeding
  • napping
  • poop
  • post-baby bodies
  • bath-time

Perhaps I need an attitude adjustment?

In my defense, I’m working hard at the attitude adjustment.  Saturday, I went shopping with “due-in-February” for a dress to wear to her sister-in-law’s wedding and some transition clothes to wear before she needs full-on maternity clothes.  I’m in the midst of planning a baby shower for “due-in-November” and I’m going to start babysitting for the twins so “mom-of-twins” can start going to the gym a couple of times a week.  Honestly, I think I just need to get over myself. 

I’m working on not letting any circumstances rob me of my joy.  I’m always very careful not to let my circumstances rob my sweet pregnant friends of their joy and I need to stop being so retarded about letting their circumstances rob me of mine.



  1. Rach said,

    I seriously have NO idea how you do it with the small group you’re in. Seriously. I was bitter betty when I was in MOPS with her and lamenting TLT (the lost twin).

    Just remember, though, when you get your happy baby ending, they will be surrounding you with showers and love. 🙂

  2. Rach said,

    oh my gosh I was dying… “i nearly shot my face off.” good thing i wasn’t drinking anything or it would have been all over the keyboard.
    you and i will get along for SURE

  3. Lainey-Paney said,

    I’m new.

    I don’t know the whole story….but let’s see if I have it straight:
    you have a small group—everyone gets babies & you get the miscarriages. Yeah…that seems fair.
    I’ll be bitter with you. That way you can be bitter here & sweet there, so as to not rob anyone of their joy.

    But yeah….it sucks.

  4. Lainey-Paney said,

    okay…i just read your old “left behind” post.

    you know…in this group of yours….it WOULD be nice if they were sensitive to your feelings some. ya think??? I know that their pregnancies & children are now monopolizing their every waking moment (and their dreams too, I’m sure…) It’s where they are right now. and you are sensitive enough to allow them that, and be supportive of that….
    …but if they know what you’ve been through & are currently going through…they can curtail some of the conversation a bit. And, these women were the same people before they got pregnant—they were capable of carrying on conversations about non-pregnancy related matters then, and they are capable of it now. Perhaps there just needs to be a balance. And….you could try to bring up non-pregnancy related topics to discuss or get their opinions on…. just an idea….

    Now…the good news of being the last to have the babies….
    *Hand-me-downs. These save you a ton of money, and you generally get some pretty cute stuff!
    *Learning from their mistakes & good decisions: they’ll know which diaper creams rock & tips on this & that.

    Okay…for now, that’s all I’ve got….

  5. Lainey-Paney said,

    oh….another thing….the gals in your group may have tested the waters a bit already, and if you haven’t let on that this constant conversation is bothersome to you or upsetting in any way….they may think that their conversations are okay & that you are “over” the miscarriages…
    if you’ve been very stoic & going along to get along, they may have misinterpreted things….and maybe all you have to do is let them know how left behind you feel in all of this….

  6. anonymouseandcheese said,

    Lainey-Paney –
    Yes, you’re right. My girlfriends have tested the waters and I have not let on in the least that I get to feeling sorry for myself with all the pregnancy talk. I engage with them, hold their babies, ask questions about how things are going, etc. I’m sure they think I’m fine because that’s all I’ve led them to believe. I know that if they knew, they would nip it in the bud. I’m trying to find the appropriate balance between grieving my losses and celebrating their joys and I think its kind of an ongoing thing to figure out.

  7. shoeaddict said,

    Just coming to say hello. Wondering where you came from?? I mean how you found me

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