November 20, 2007
Christmas list
So, my friend just had a baby. I decided that I want a baby. Like a tiny newborn baby. I want an episiotomy to complain about. I want a bunch of loose empty skin on my belly. I want to wake up every 2 hours in the middle of the night. I want to be afraid to go to the grocery store for fear of a blow-out or a melt-down. I want to have spit-up stains on my furniture and carpet. I want my dishwasher to be full of pacifiers and sippy cups and funny plastic forks that don’t stab anything. I want to catch vomit in my hand. I want to forget what its like to have my hair fixed or wear clothes that actually fit me. I want to greet my husband at the door with a screaming infant and say, “take your son/daughter.” I want to have tiny socks sprinkled throughout my house amongst the slimy, discarded cheerios and half-eaten graham crackers. I want to have to dig through the toy box to find my keys and be five minutes later than I was going to be already. I want morning sickness and swollen ankles. I want to have sore feet from stepping on Happy Meal toys and sore biceps from carrying around the infant car seat.
I told God all of this the other day. He didn’t say anything, but He did give me a stern look.
I’m still working on contentment (clearly). I came across these verses the other day though, and I’m liking them right now. They are taken out of context a little bit, but at the end of the day, I’m not warping the meaning altogether.
Habakkuk 3:17-19 (NIV):
17 Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,18 yet I will rejoice in the LORD,
I will be joyful in God my Savior.19 The Sovereign LORD is my strength;
he makes my feet like the feet of a deer,
he enables me to go on the heights.
not imitation cheese 
Rach said,
November 20, 2007 at 6:09 pm
Because this is the cry of your heart, it is the cry of mine, too, friend! I am making a commitment to pray for you daily! You are teaching me so much about my own walk.
shoeaddict said,
November 21, 2007 at 3:10 am
I feel you, Mousie!! I really do. I will pray for you, too.
gretchen from lifenut said,
November 24, 2007 at 3:34 pm
Oh, Anonymouse. Adding my prayers that you will have all of this and more.
Rach said,
November 28, 2007 at 9:09 am
I just love the honesty of this post. And I can just envision you doing all of those things and doing them wonderfully. Now if we could just get God to speed it all up…I am terrible at patience (if you hadn’t noticed). You are just so cool to me, on a variety of levels.
But anyway, thank you for this honesty. And I am still laughing about the keys in the toy box and stains on the couch and crushed graham crackers. You definitely have a realistic view of it all. When mini-mouse comes along and I am reading about all of that stuff really happening I will look at this post and smile.
anonymouseandcheese said,
November 28, 2007 at 12:55 pm
Thanks, Rach. I think the things that I’ll be the best at are the loose belly skin and the complaining. Definitely the loose belly skin. (And by the way, that applies even if we adopt. I think its unfair that adoptive mothers don’t get a free ticket to gain 25 pounds.)